Sunday, February 17, 2008

Roast beef Sunday

Did y'all typically have roast beef on Sundays growing up? We did and although I don't adhere to the tradition as much as my mom did, it's still a good thing and a comfort. I have a feeling my mom would have enjoyed utilizing a crock pot as much as I do but to be honest, mine never tastes as good as hers did. My mother wasn't the best cook in the world - not because she didn't do what she did well but because she wasn't adventurous at all in the kitchen. Making spaghetti once a month was quite the culinary adventure for her and we always had the same odd side dishes to go with it....cole slaw and crackers. My normal friends' moms' had salad and garlic bread with theirs but not mine. But you know what? You should try it....it works. Trust me. Anyway, my dad was a very good cook and actually liked to cook with onions, garlic, and spices, to some degree. He was a cook in the Army and went to some kind of cooking school during his time there. He was very proud of his service, as well he should be, and was particularly proud of his skill for choosing the best meat - anytime, anywhere. He often critiqued meals that he ate away from home and claimed that although the Outback had "pretty good steaks", they didn't meet his high standards. I loved my parents and their eccentricities. I miss them both terribly.

It's been a cloudy, windy, gray day here in the mountains. My kind of Sunday! I don't look forward to going to work this week but thankfully, I work part time and that suits me just fine. I can contribute to our household and still have my housewife time, which I treasure. We are so looking forward to moving to our new house soon and making it ours. This is an answer to many long years of prayer for us. We've always wanted to live in the country and now we will. God is so good. I look forward to seeing what kinds of animals we might see out there. I'm secretly hoping for a bear or two....from a distance, mind you. But then again, maybe not. Well, maybe one that I can only see through binoculars.

I hope you all sleep tight and have peaceful dreams. I'm off to get ready for my week.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Sam

Sam is my husband. He is my best friend. He loves me in the truest sense of the word. It's what he does - he loves me.

We tell everyone that we've known each other all of our lives. While that may not be technically true, we are each other's second half. What a rare gift we have been given and we know how blessed we are by God. Sam and I have our own special language, meant only for one another. He can make me laugh louder and cry harder and feel deeper and love more wholly than any other human being. He is my protector, my confidante, my joy, my heart, and my lifelong love. There is nowhere else I would rather be than with my Sam. He has wiped my tears at the passing of my daddy, my brother, and my little dog. He takes care of me when I'm sick or hurting. He washes dishes for me after supper. He feeds our little animals faithfully every night. He does everything in his power to make my life easier, sweeter, and truer. He understands me like no other human being. He never makes me feel stupid or ugly or silly. He knows just what I mean when I need to not explain myself.

Sam is very handsome and I'm so proud to be his wife. For the life of me, I don't know what he sees in me but I am grateful he sees beyond my exterior because I know he loves me inside and out. I seek his advice above all others and treasure his wisdom. He is so smart that it's scary sometimes. He is so funny and so quick witted and on occasion, has made me almost wet my pants from laughing so hard. I love him so.

Sam is the best husband, dad, and PaPa in this world. His family is blessed to have him as our head.

He makes me want to be a better woman and I love him immeasurably. I love you, Sam. Happy Valentine's Day.

Sunday, February 10, 2008

Back pain

Oh, I could sure use some advice. I have had a backache for several days now and I'm not getting a lot of relief. It seems to be focused on one side - I think I mis-stepped or twisted it somehow but at any rate, I am having a hard time getting comfortable. The pain is across my lower back. If any of you ladies have had this problem and can offer some suggestions, I'm open to them and will be very grateful.

We are having a windy, cold day today. Sam went to church this morning and I stayed home to rest. I hated missing, as always, but especially because we were having the Lord's Supper today and I hate not being able to partake. I am comforted in knowing that my church family will be praying for me this week as I wait on my back to feel better.

There isn't much to report today. We are still missing our little Snow Pea terribly and I still find myself looking for her, but not as much. It's finally sinking in that she's gone. I will probably ask for her ashes to be returned to me this week. I anticipate the horrible feeling I'll have as I hold a tiny box with her ashes knowing that that container has more love and devotion in it than can be measured. I miss her.

I pray you have a peaceful Sunday and please send any backache remedies this way if you are so inclined. Thank you.

Wednesday, February 6, 2008

Grateful

I'm so grateful that my loved ones were not hurt during last night's horrific storms. I am also very saddened by the tragic loss of many lives. It's a hard thing to understand....seeing God's might in such dramatic ways. It's as though you see death's hand reaching out from the sky and plucking life up randomly when you watch tornadoes. I've had a couple of close calls and it is a horrifying experience.

My elderly mother-in-law lives in the path of tornadoes. She lives alone and doesn't drive. She also is not able to move around easily in her small home anymore so we were very worried about her being able to get to safety last night. Thankfully, she was feeling pretty spry and was able to maneuver well yesterday and even though she didn't have to retreat to her bathroom for shelter, we were comforted to know that she could get there if she needed to.

I am facing tomorrow with sadness as it will be one week that I lost my little dog. It will also be the first day off I've had in many, many years that I haven't had her to spend it with me. It is getting easier day by day but I know it will be a long, long time before I can think of her without a stab of pain in my heart. My Sam feels the same way. We feel as though we've lost a child. We have two cats that we love dearly but since losing little Snow Pea, I am afraid we haven't made much of an effort to interact with them. We know that they need our love, too, and are probably missing their little friend, so we are making a concerted effort to show them extra love now. We will all be blessed for it.

I am off to soak in a nice, hot bath. I've had a backache for a couple of days now and it's starting to really get on my nerves. Hope you have a pleasant and peaceful night.

Sunday, February 3, 2008

I'm back

I wasn't sure if I would get back in the groove of posting or not, but I have missed it.

Nothing major had happened in my life up until this past Monday (more on that shortly) but I just had so much going on with everyday life that I had no energy left for sharing my thoughts. I did miss this, though. As far as my beautiful granddaughters, they are doing well. I stayed with my kids to help out week before last and had some wonderful bonding time with the babies. They are still on monitors but I am hoping they are taken off of those this week. I don't really think they are needed now and I fear that my son and daughter-in-law have become somewhat dependent on them. The babies are almost 7 and 8 lbs. respectively and will be two months old tomorrow and even if the monitors went off, it was a technical problem and not a medical one. Besides, when this grandma stayed there and took the "night shift", I would not drift off to sleep because I was so fearful that the danged monitor would go off and I wouldn't hear it. So....the first night I was there, I was up all night and didn't go to sleep until 6:30 a.m. then got up at 10. That wasn't fun. I was pretty punchy by the next night and I did get to sleep somewhat well. At any rate, they are growing and adorable and I love them so much.

After that week, hubby and I found a house and piece of property that we really liked. It has 4 acres and a house built in 1950 with beautiful hardwood floors and a fireplace (a requirement for me) and a PERFECT spot for a hot tub some day. (wink wink) We decided to throw caution to the wind and see about getting it. Well, lo and behold, we made an offer, it was accepted, and we will sign the loan papers tomorrow (we are pre-approved). I won't get too excited until it's all said and done because sometimes I put the cart before the horse. But for now, we think it will be ours. It's surrounded by mountains and there are hills with cows grazing right next to our place, which is one of the loveliest sights in the world to me. It will be fun to renovate the outdated bathrooms and kitchen and to make it ours. And there is a huge spot for a garden.

Okay, now back to Monday and the major thing that happened. I took my little dog to be groomed. That night, when I got home, I noticed she was breathing hard and had a disturbing cough which sounded to me like a heart problem. I took her to the vet. Tuesday and it was discovered that she had a grossly enlarged heart with lots of fluid retention. She was put on 4 different types of medication and I was told that we would know in a few days if it would work or not. By Thursday morning, it was clear to me that she was suffering. She couldn't lay her head down to sleep because it would obstruct her breathing and she was so tired. I loved her too much to let her suffer and I made the agonizing decision to have her put to sleep. It was the hardest thing I've ever done. I have had her since she was born and I loved her more than I can measure. She was my little shadow and my friend.

We chose to have her cremated and Sam will bury her little ashes at our farm, on a hill. I would rather have buried her without cremating her but I couldn't go off and leave her buried at this rental house and I couldn't wait another month until we move to keep her body frozen, so this was the best option for us.

Please pray for Sam and me as we are deeply grieving. Our house is so empty now and my fingers ache to stroke her again.